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50% of marriages end in divorce. We’ve all heard this statistic so often that it’s easy to brush off.

With repetition, it’s easy to tune it out and not consider the implications. And of those who do think about it, most don’t think it applies to them. I know that when I got married, it certainly didn’t feel like I was gambling on a coin flip…

Let’s add some additional info into the mix and present the math a bit differently…

Yes, 50% of marriages end in divorce.

In the book You Can Be Right (Or You Can Be Married), author Dana Adam Shapiro explains that of the remaining 50% that stay together:
-1/3 are “happy…”
-1/3 are “happy enough…”
-1/3 are “unhappy…”

To do the math another way, only 17% of marriages are happy (50% / 3 = 16.67%).

That math seems pretty dark. You could use that math to give up… or you could use it to realize that marriage takes work.

The reality is, you're not alone in struggling. You and your wife are not along in being imperfect You’re not alone in falling short of the fake social media portrayals of marriage.

This math is a stark reminder that a happy marriage isn't an accident or luck. It takes hard work, grace, forgiveness and lots of mistakes.

Use this to remember that if it was easy, more than 17% of marriages would be happy.

So what are we to do? Practically, how can we move forward into the 17% of marriages that would say they are happy?

Here’s what I’ve found from years of searching for secret marriage formulas, hacks and quick fixes:

There is no secret formula. There are no shortcuts, and nothing about this will be quick. (You can make some changes quickly, but the process itself will not be quick.)

Looking for shortcuts and quick fixes is the reason why your marriage is still struggling.

You’re distracting yourself with an impossible quest. You’re spending more time & energy searching for something that doesn’t exist than you are putting into fixing the problems in your marriage.

Are you really surprised with where it has gotten you?

There is only one formula I have found for success in marriage. It’s not secret, and there is definitely no short cut involved. It’s simple enough, but not easy.

I wish it was different, but here it is:

Step 1: Find men who have already become the type of husband you want to be, who have already built the type of marriage you want to have.

Step 2: Get as close to them as you can. Read their books and listen to their podcasts. Join their groups or coach with them. If possible, spend time with them in person.

Step 3: Consistently put in the work to become like them. Copy their habits, ask them questions, be teachable.

Do this consistently OVER TIME and your marriage will be unrecognizable.

Or change nothing and nothing will change.

P.S. When you're ready, there are 3 ways that I can help you:

1. ​Book a FREE 45-Minute "Power Session" Trouble shoot, get some outside perspective on what you're struggling with, ask for advice or learn more about 1-on-1 coaching & the Men's Groups... FREE with no strings attached. No hard-close sales pitch.
2. ​Apply for one of the Men's Groups: Join a small group of men forming an environment of brotherhood & accountability to grow into uncommon men, husbands and fathers.
3. ​Apply for 1-on-1 Coaching: Focused, personalized 1-on-1 attention and accountability to go deep on your inner journey with an experienced guide. Firm but caring accountability from another man is a game-changer.

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